


Broken

by samalambis



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Fallen Castiel, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-06-22
Updated: 2013-06-22
Packaged: 2017-12-15 18:36:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 483
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/852741
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/samalambis/pseuds/samalambis
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It wasn't sweet, it wasn't full of soulful stares, it was quick and rough and left bruises.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Broken

Castiel was never quite the same after the fall. His angel - _his, oh god his_ \- angel went from quite affection and reverent stares to out right _begging_ to be taken. To be _used_. To have just a few moments of quiet reverie from all that had happened. And Dean had given it to him. Dean had used the broken shell of his angel in every depraved way he could to ease the pain and emotion turmoil that wracked both their minds and body's with each breath and step they took, with each swing of their knife, each shot gun shell that bounced idly on the floor, with each totally and utterly _human_ gesture Castiel had used.

And Castiel had gladly received it, had gladly soaked up the broken affection and touches that in some other universe, some other _happier_ universe, could have qualified as something akin to - _twisted, depraved_ \- love. It wasn't sweet, it wasn't full of soulful stares, it was quick and rough and left bruises that would give them some form of comfort in knowing someone else shared their misery until the marks faded, only to be quickly replaced when Castiel and Dean had a few moments alone and he slid to his knees and unfastened Dean's belt and made quick work of getting what he wanted. Dean tried to stop, honest to god - _where ever the hell that bastard is_ \- he tried to make Castiel see reason, he tried to get his sweet and faithful _Cas_ back.

However even Dean with all his hope could see it was a lost cause. Could see how eerily similar this Castiel was to the one he had only known for a few days in that twisted dimension when all they had to worry about was stopping the apocalypse -was stopping Lucifer. So in solstice of night when they found comfort in each others body, when Castiel and him desperately tore at each others clothes till they found skin and even then proceeded to grab until their knuckles turned white and the skin beneath gave way to ugly purple-brown marks, did he dare to let a few tears shed.

And for a few moments, a few blessed moments, his Cas was _back_ , his beloved Castiel would slow his ministrations and leave one hand gripping ever so softly the mark upon his shoulder as he wiped the tears away as a few of his own - _so human now damn it_ \- slipped. For a few moments they merely shared each others breath, clutched and held the other as if they were their only life line, the only thing binding them to the Earth.

And no matter how much they wished it, it never lasted more than a few moments before the new Cas was back and Dean went through the motions again, and again, and fuck-it-all-to-hell _again_.

It was all they could do to not break.

**Author's Note:**

> Came to me when I was listening to Angel by Massive Attack. umu


End file.
